The significance attached to marriage in India is reflected in the fact that only a very small percentage of men and women remain unmarried. The Report of the Committee on the Status of Women in India, 1974 has indicated that only 0.5% of women never marry in India. By and large girls are brought up to believe that marriage is a woman’s destiny; married state is desirable and motherhood is a cherished achievement. Only a very small percentage of men and women remain unmarried by choice.

The religious texts of many communities in India have outlined the purpose, rights and duties involved in marriage.

Marriage among Hindus

Among the Hindus, for instance, marriage is regarded as a socio-religious duty. Ancient Hindu texts point out three main aims of marriage. These are dharma (duty), paraja (progeny) and rati (sensual pleasure). That is to say that marriage is significant from both the societal as well as the individual’s point of view. Marriage is significant in that it provides children especially sons who would not only carry on the family name but also perform periodic rituals.  For the Hindus, marriage is a sacrament. This means that a Hindu marriage cannot be dissolved. It is a union for life.

Religious and caste endogamy are two f the most pervasive forms of endogamy among Hindus. The endogamous unit, for many varnas, consists of a series of kin clusters living in a fairly restricted geographical area i.e. castes. There are variations regionally. In South India, for instance, among many castes marriage with some relatives is preferred. In the Marathi, Telugu, Tamil and Kannada speaking area, marriages with the cross-cousins (children of father’s sisters or mother’s brothers) are preferred. In North India, neither the parallel nor the cross-cousins can intermarry. In North India, on the other hand, there is a tendency to marry into villages that are not farther than twelve or thirteen kilometers from one’s village. According to the rule of hypergamy, the status of the husband is always higher than that of the wife.

Exogamous rules are complementary to endogamous rules. These rules prohibit marriage between members of certain groups. The prohibition may be so narrow as to include those members within the elementary family or so wide to include all those with whom genealogical kinship(Lineages) can be traced. The definitions of these groups, however, show variations mainly by region and religion. In North India, a girl born within a village is considered the daughter of the village and hence cannot marry a boy from her own village. Thus, the village becomes the exogamous unit here. In South India, the exogamous unit in one’s own generation is defined by one’s own sisters/brothers and real and classificatory parallel cousins.

Two other kinds of exogamy which have been prevalent among several Hindu communities in North and South India are sagotra and sapinda exogamy. Sagotra exogamy applies to those who trace descent from a common ancestor, usually a rishi or a sage. The term gotra is commonly used to mean an exogamous category within a jati.

A four clan rule or four gotra exogamous rule prevails among Hindu castes in North India. In accordance with this four clan (gotra) rule, a  man cannot marry a girl from (i) has father’s gotra or clan, (ii) his mother’s gotra or clan, (iii) his dadi’s, i.e., his father’s gotra or clan, and (iv) his nani’s, i.e., his mother’s mother gotra or clan. In almost all castes in the northern Zone, according to Karve (1953), the marriage between cousins is prohibited. We can show the four-clan rule in a diagram in the following manner.

The Ist cross indicates the marriage of ego to a person of ego’s father’s gotra. The 2nd cross indicates the marriage of ego to a person of ego’s mother’s gotra. The 3rd cross indicates the marriage of ego to a person of ego’s paternal grandmother’s (dadi’s) gotra. The 4th cross indicates the marriages of ego to a person of ego’s maternal grandmother’s (nani’s) gotra. All the categories of marriage are prohibited among the Hindu castes in North India.

Sapinda exogamy indicates the prohibition placed on the inter-marriage between certain sets of relatives. Sapinda represents the relationship between the living member and their dead ancestors. The term sapinda means (i) those who share the particles of the same body (ii) people who are united by offering ‘pinda’ or balls of cooked rice to the same dead ancestor. Hindu law givers do not give a uniform definition regarding the kinship groups within which marriage cannot take place. Some prohibit marriage of members within seven generations on the father’s side and five generation of members from the mother’s side. Some others have restricted the prohibited generations to five on the father’s and three on the mother’s side. Several others have permitted the marriage of cross-cousins (marriage of a person with his father’s sister’s children or mother’s brother’s children).

The Hindu Marriage Act of 1955 does not allow marriage within five generations on the father’s side and three on the mother’s side. However, it permits the marriage of cross cousins where this is customary. The patrilineal joint family is an important exogamous unit among Hindus. This much is quite clear from the fact that marriage is prohibited within five generations on the father’s side.

Majority of the marriages in India are fixed or arranged by parents or elders on behalf of and/or with the consent of the boy or the girl involved in marriage. When marriage is fixed by parents or elders it is called an arranged marriage. This is in contrast to marriage by self choice. The restrictions placed on free interaction between a boy and a girl in India is yet another factor which does not allow marriage by self choice.

For majority of the high caste Hindus. matching of horoscope constitutes an important element in the final choice of the marriage partner. Today apart from astrologers matching the horoscopes of a boy and a girl, computers are also used to match horoscopes. Among the Muslims, the parents, elders or wali (guardian) arrange a marriage

Some of the essential marriage rites are kanyadan (the giving off of the bride to the groom by the father), panigrahana (the clasping of the bridge’s hand by the groom), agniparinaya (going around the sacred fire by the bride and the groom). Iajahoma (offering of the parched grain to the sacrifical fire)  and saptapadi (walking seven steps by the bride and the groom).

Among the Hindus, until the passing of the Hindu Marriage Act of 1955,  a Hindu man was permitted to marry more than one woman at a time. Although permitted, polygyny, has not been common among the Hindus. Only limited sections of the population like kings, chieftains, headmen of villages, members of the landed aristocracy actually practised polygyny.

Polyandry is even less common than polygyny. A few Kerala castes practised polyandry until recently. The Toda of the Nilgiris in Tamilnadu, the Khasa of Jaunsar Bawar in Dehradun district of Uttar Pradesh and some North Indian castes practise polyandry. In the fraternal form of polyandry, the husbands are brothers. In 1958. C.M. Abraham (1958:107-8) has reported that in Central Travancore fraternal polyandry was practised by larger number of groups like the Irava, Kaniyan, the Vellan and the Asari.

Marriage among Muslims

Islam looks upon marriage as “sunnah” (an obligation) which must be fulfilled by every Muslim. Among the Muslims it is the man who is allowed have four wives. Among them men enjoy greater privileges than women. A Muslim woman cannot marry a second time when her first husband is alive or if she has not been divorced by him.

Endogamous rules are operative in muslim population. Among the Muslims, the ‘Syeds’, recognised as an aristocratic class, are divided into various endogamous groups. Sometimes the endogamous group is so small that it includes only the extended familiesof a man’s paraents. Muslims permit marriages between both cross (mother’s brother’s children and father’s sister’s children) and parallel (offspring mother’s sister’s children and father’s  brother’s children) cousins. In fact, the father’s brother’s daughter is a preferred mate. Among  Muslims the concept of purity of blood seems to be mainly responsible for preference of marriage between close relatives particularly between children of siblings. Many Muslims groups in North and Western India consider marriage between children of two brothers as most desirable. It is held that the desire to keep the family property within the family has been another important reason for close kin marriages. It is generally believed that marriage of the near kin helps to mitigate the conflict between  a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law and this helps to strengthen the intra-as-well as inter-familial ties.

Among Muslims, the elementary or nuclear family is the exogamous unit. Moplah Muslims of North Malabar in Kerala live in matrilineal units and amon them matrilneage is the exogamous unit. Lineage exogamy also exists among the Muslim Gujjars of Jammu and Kashmir (Srinivas 1969:56). Among the Nayars, who are a matrilineal group, a girl can never marry her mother’s brother.

Muslim marriage is not a sacrament. Rather, it is a contract, which can be terminated. Among the Muslims, the marriage rituals show variation by sect and region. Some rites of the Shia sect of the Muslims differ from the Sunni, a sect among the Muslims. However, the essential ceremony of Muslim marriae is known as the nikah. The cerenomy is performed by the priest or the kazi. The nikah is  considered to be complete only when the consent of both the groom and the bride has been obtained. A formal document known as nikahnama bears the signatures of the couple. Among certain sections, the signatures of two witnesses are also included  in the document and the document may also certain details of the payment to be made to the bride by the groom. This payment is called the mehr which is a stipulated sum of money or other assets paid to the wife either immediately after the wedding or postponed till some future date.

Many of the marriage customs and rituals of the Muslims are similar to those of the Hindus. Thus, customs like smearing of turmeric (Haldi), applying mehndi, mock testing of the bride’s proficiency at domestic work are as much a part of the Muslim marriage as Hindu marriage. In fact, among the Moplah Muslims of Kerala, the nikah cerenomy is performed as laid down by Islam but their marriage is not regarded complete without the Hindu function ‘kalyanam’.

What is most significant to note in the rituals of Muslims marriage is that the custom of paying a mehr to the wife provides some sort of guarantee of security to the woman.

Islam, on the other hand, has allowed for polygyny. A Muslm man can have as many as four wives, at a time, provided all are treated as equals. However, it seems that polygynous unions have been restricted to a small percentage of Muslims, namely the rich and the powerful.

Marriage among Christians

Christianity holds marriage as crucial to life and lays emphasis on the establishment of a mutual relationship between husband and wife and on their duty to each other. Among Christians, the elementary or nuclear family is the exogamous unit.

Among the Christians, the wedding takes place in a church. The exchange of the ring is an important ritual among them. Some sections of the Christians, like the Syrian Christians of Kerala, have the Hindu rite of the groom tying a ‘tali’ on the bride’s neck. Tali is a symbol of the married state of Hindu women in South India.

Among Christians, the following pronouncement, which forms a part of the marriage rites, reflects the importance assigned to the relationship of the husband and wife, rather than the relationship between the families of the husband  the wife. “Man shall leave his father and mother and shall leave to his wife and they shall be one flesh.” This outlook emphasizes the fact that marriage is a bond between two individuals and not between two families. It does not focus on the transfer of the girl from one family to another.

Marriage among Sikhs

Certain sections of the Jain community (like the Digambara and Svetambara) and the Sikh community have marriage customs and rituals, which are similar to those of the Hindus. The core ceremony of the Sikhs however is different. It is called “anand karaj” and is solemnised in the presence of the Guru Granth Sahib, the holy book of the Sikhs. The main ceremony consists of the bridal couple going four times around the holy book. Appropriate verses, known as ‘shabad’ are recited by the officiating priest. Unlike Hindus, Sikhs do not have any particular period or season for marriages.

Customary Marriages

While rites constitute an important component of marriage among many communities, there are sections of groups of people who do not have religious rites in marriage. Marriage with no rites are referred as customary marriages. These marriages are based on simple practices. For instance, in some groups living in the Himalayan tract putting a ring in the bride’s nose is a customary form of marriage. Customary forms of marriage are generally found among those groups where divorce and secondary marriages are permitted and practised. Secondary marriage of a widow or  a separated or divorced woman is usually celebrated in a simple way which indicates essentially the renewal of her married state.

Marriage and its changing patterns

Today, marriage is still considered important and necessary and only few individuals remain unmarried by choice.

Marriage for self-fulfillment

Goals of marriage are, however, undergoing changes especially for the urban and educated sections of the population. Marriage for self-fulfillment rather than primarily for procreation or social welfare is also becoming prevalent. Due to the influence of western culture many males and females do not consider marriage to be necessary these days. Due to economic difficulties also some persons do not enter into matrimony. 

Age at marriage in India

Early marriage have been common in India. Though there are differences between various religious groups, classes and castes in the matter of age at marriage, the median age at marriage is low in India. As early as the 18th and 19th century, efforts have been made to curb infant or child marriage. Reformers like Raja Rammohun Roy. Ishwar Chandra Vidyasagar, Jyotiba Phule and others in the 19th and early 20th century opposed child marriage. In 1929, the Child Marriage Restraint Act was passed (popularly known as the Sarda Act) and the minimum age for marriage for girls and boys was fixed at 14 years and 17 years respectively. The act was made applicable to all Indians. The latest amendment (in 1978) has raised the minimum age for marriage for boys and girls to 18 years and 21 years, respectively.

In spite of legislations, and government and non-government efforts to educate the people about the dangers of early marriage, age at marriage is low in India. The 1971 Census data on marital status of women indicate that the average age of marriage for girls in more than one-third of the total number of districts in our country is below 15 years (Ghosh 1984:5). In some states like Orissa, Madhya Pradesh, Uttar Pradesh and Rajasthan, child marriage continue (National Perspective Plan 1988).

It is important to point out on the basis of growing evidence that age at marriage has not been low for all communities in India. Among the Christians. Parsis and some educated  sections living in urban areas, the age at marriage has been above the minimum age prescribed by law.

Forms of marriage

Monogamy is the most prevalent form of marriage in India in India today. However, bigamous (having two spouses at a time) marriages have been reported among the Hindus in many parts of India.

Patterns of selection of spouse

Traditionally, there are three striking features regarding selection of spouse in India.  Intercaste marriages are now recognised by law and take place on a larger scale than before. Caste endogamy is still highly relevant in the context of the patterns of selection of  spouse. Many caste organisations devise all kinds of strategies to confine marriages within their castes and subcastes. Though majority of marriages continue to be arranged by parents/elders/wali, the pattern of choosing one’s spouse by self-choice either with or without parents’ consent is increasing. Among urban educated classes arranged marriage with the consent of the boy and the girl is today the most preferred. Marriages are even arranged through newspaper advertisement for both the boy and the girl.

Marriage rites

Today marriage rites have been condensed to a great-extent. The Special Marriage Act of 1954 provides for secular and civil marriage before a registrar. This Act applies to all Indian citizens who chose to make use of its provisions, irrespective of religions affiliations; Civil marriage enables persons to avoid the expense of traditional weddings. However, weddings continue to be an expensive affair for a large majority of people.  

Dowry and bride price

Marriage in most cases, involves material as well as non-material transactions between the bride-giver and the bride-taker. It involves, with a few exceptions, the transfer of the wife to the husband’s family. Two major types of transfers of material wealth accompany marriage. In one, wealth travels in the opposite direction of the bride and in another; it travels along with the bride in the same direction. The former is identified as bride price while the latter as dowry. Today, the practice of dowry has taken a very ugly turn. Educated girls look out for boys who are more qualified than them. Highly qualified boys demand a high dowry. In 1961, the Government of India passed the Dowry Prohibition Act. In 1984 and again in 1986, the Act was amended to make the law more stringent and effective. For instance, today, the husband and his family can be  penalized for demanding dowry if his bride dies within seven years of the marriage in other than normal circumstances. We even have a Dowry Prohibition Cell to look into complaints about dowry.

All this does not mean that there are no marriages taking place without dowry. There are progressive young people who voice their strong opinion against dowry and marry without it. Even among other communities, like the Muslim and Christian, some people demand dowry.

Divorce

The grounds for divorce have been spelt out both by custom and by law in different communities. During 1940-48, several provinces and states passed laws permitting divorce for Hindus. The Special Marriage Act of 1954 introduced and ‘clarified the grounds for divorce’. It has been available to all Indian who have chosen to register their marriage under this Act. The Hindu Marriage Act of 1955 was amended several  times since 1955 (the latest being in 1978) to incorporate a wide range of grounds for divorce available to both men and women coming under the purview of this Act.

Among the Muslims, marriage is a contact and divorce is allowed. Muslim law provides for different types of divorce of which talaq and khol need special mention. Talaq is an exjudicial divorce. It becomes effective if pronounced thrice unilaterally by the husband. It signifies the power the husband has to divorce his wife at will. The other form of divorce khol takes place by mutual consent.

Widow Remarriage

Widow remarriage has been customarily sanctioned and practised. Only those castes which imitate the life-style and values of the high castes adopt the practice of banning widow remarriage. Widow remarriage is permitted among the Muslims, Christians and Parsis. Among the Jains local and caste customs determine the issue. Although law does not restrict anybody to remarry

The above mentioned changes in Hindu marriage are indicative of progress on the one hand and disorganization on the other.  The increase in the incidence of divorce, are indicative of disorganization in Hindu marriage.  Changes such as the prohibition of polygamy, the restriction of child marriages, the permission of widow remarriage and freedom in the choice of mate are healthy signs of progress.  The sanctity of martial bond has, however, diminished. English education, women education, influence of western culture, urbanization and industrialization have changed social values of the Hindu male and female. 

In fact the marriage system is passing through a transitional stage.  Inspite of these fast changes it can be safely predicated that there is no immediate danger to the institution of Hindu marriage because of the psychological security which it provides.